It is very important to me that it be understood: I am a frightened person. I practice stepping over that fear to grab what I want. It is practice. It is not inherent to my nature. Every day that I choose to say “Fuck it, I’m taking it”, I find that the mindset is becoming habitual. It’s a matter of encountering enough circumstances that I recognize the situation & revert to If/Then. These circumstances are encountered by living, really living, life. It’s comfortable behind a keyboard. Those of us who are shy and really do not like social situations, we like it here. But, are we living? Are we telling ourselves that we are being social when really we are refusing to step over that fear and grab what we want? Blogging began as a way for me to process this fucking incredible life that I have earned. Now it has become a crutch to avoid actually living it. It’s unacceptable.
I can develop a sense of humor about assholes. I don’t want to. I want to remain pissed off by disrespect because there was a time when it was all I knew. Virtual or face-to-face, no means no. It does not mean keep asking me. It does not mean question my reasons. It means NO and no one is due any explanation. There can be no tolerance for that bullshit. None. When groups of Tumblrs swell around a Tumblr who does not understand “No” and thoroughly explain the wrongness of that behavior, change will occur. At the moment, I see most everyone accepting it as the norm. That’s okay but it’s not for me.